Buckets, Bouquets & Basset Hounds: A Dahlia’s Tale

Dearest Readers,

What a season it has been so far at Dearest Dahlia! One might have thought the storms and mini-droughts would bow our blooms into submission, but no, my dahlias are made of sterner stuff. With the poise of royalty and the stamina of marathon runners, they have continued to dazzle and delight, each bloom strutting its colours as if walking the runway at a floral fashion show.

And enchant they did, for I have now begun the delightful business of supplying bouquets to the ever-chic Shells Café in Strandhill every Thursday. A glamorous affair, though not without its backstage hiccups. It turns out that dahlias, being top-heavy divas, refuse to behave in ordinary buckets. They swoon, they topple, they demand stronger vessels, as if to say, “We are not common wildflowers, darling.” Lesson learned.

Then, of course, came my late-night bouquet escapades, headlamp aglow, bugs flinging themselves at me as if auditioning for a Hitchcock film, and my basset hound Napoleon barking furiously. To his mind, a one-eyed glowing creature had invaded the flower field. To mine, I was simply a sleep-deprived bloom boss doing battle with beetles. (Needless to say, Napoleon kept a safe distance, proving once again that bravery is not the basset hound’s most notable trait.)

Meanwhile, my Pick Your Own Bouquet days have been nothing short of a triumph. So much so that demand is spilling into the weekdays! At present, I am happily taking private appointments, simply contact me directly and I shall make it happen. But next year, my dears, I plan to refine the system: visitors may come at leisure, mornings between 10 and 12 or afternoons from 3:30 to 6, and pick to their heart’s content. Payment will be delightfully simple, just €2 per stem plucked. A fair trade, I dare say, for armfuls of beauty.

And then there is my little Dearest Dahlia Curiosity Shop. What began as a modest experiment has bloomed into quite the success, I have already had to restock, and more delectable delights will be appearing on the shelves very soon. For now, the shop is open upon request, but it too shall join the bouquet hours next year, offering treasures both floral and otherwise.

But, now, the true triumph, The Sligo Secret Gardens. For three Sundays, my garden gates were flung open, and from noon until five it was a whirl of chatter, laughter, and questions. Our magnificent tea tent became the jewel of the event, stocked with an exquisite porcelain tea service and décor to match with sweet delicacies sourced by my marvelous neighbours from generous sponsors. The result? A resounding success: we raised an astonishing €2,200 for the Jack and Jill Children’s Foundation. Society at its very best, if I may say so.

And now, my most thrilling announcement: Tuber pre-orders are officially open! Yes, dear readers, the very same dahlias that brought Shells Café patrons to their knees and left Secret Garden guests wide-eyed with envy can now be yours. Secure your order now, and come the new year, a parcel of dormant magic shall arrive on your doorstep—ready to transform even the most ordinary patch of soil into a showpiece fit for scandalous admiration.

Until the next whisper of news,

Yours ever in blooms and banter,

Dearest Dahlia